#270: How To Properly Invest In Yourself w/ Comedian/Writer/Actor Nick Hoff
sweq 270 audio
Wed, 9/23 · 6:11 PM38:50
SUMMARY KEYWORDS
fucking people dunk shit stand called podcast shows minutes tour piece california pandemic dude drinking worst business advice eric happen
Law Smith
0:02
sweat equity podcast and streaming show pragmatic entrepreneur advice with 100% more dick jokes on your hosts last minute sitting to my right your left on the dial on your tube. Mr. Eric red ginger renninger. Wow. Two in a row. Yeah, man, feeling it. Feeling good. Here's a little fun fact. Did you know you can ask all your Alexa your Siri, Google Home to stop
0:30
tracking you want ads? What? Know
Law Smith
0:35
what there's your fun fact added value right up front. That's how we're doing the show from now on
0:41
this do it more if you ask them.
0:44
They'll won't. They'll just say Oh, okay. We're already doing the best we can.
Law Smith
0:48
Yeah, yeah. You know, they're listening. And then the thing you talked about shows up. Sometimes it's reticular activation theory. Sometimes it's just that simple. That we are giving it to, we're volunteering our data away. This episode is brought to you by grasshopper, try grasshopper.com forward slash sweat gets you $75 off your annual plan to scalable business phone line. You got a Google Voice. It annoys me because even when you ring it up, I know it's free. But if you have a real business Google voice doesn't want you to have that either. Yeah, your real business should
1:25
be able to afford something extra.
Law Smith
1:27
If it goes to your your personal cell phones right now. And you go Hello, who dis? That's not good either. That's the first entry point for a lot of people, customers. You need grasshopper, try grasshopper.com forward slash like it's a $75 off an annual plan. That's a lot. That's a lot of them. I think a pizza buy as you were gonna say
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that. That's the
Law Smith
1:50
most shackles a Warby Parker our next sponsor feature sponsor, eyeglasses sunglasses where you can get a prescription don't get ripped off by Big Eye Warby Parker trial.com Ford slash White gets five free pairs to try on. And our other feature sponsor, express VPN tri Express VPN comm forward slash sweat, like a sweat gets you three months free off that anonymized virtual private network where you can cruise on up but you can choose the country you want to do it. Choose where you cruise maybe it's like the onion router, the Tor router, but you can choose the country you want to do it from. Ah, interesting. And if you liked this podcast and don't need those sponsors, you can contribute by subscribing rate review on Apple, iTunes podcast, app, Apple podcast app, iTunes, if you still got that, Spotify laughs again, YouTube, Facebook, Vimeo, I'm thinking for the people that don't update the old stuff. We're big on LinkedIn, we're LinkedIn. hores hit us up there. And if you want to vemos directly hit us up Eric red ginger. No one's gonna be able to do it. Eric dash, r e a d i n g er. And then I'm lost Smith 34 on Venmo we're gonna do it thirsty Instagram girl style. Yeah, that's what I like. Hashtag girthy Ri hashtag 69 b2b hashtag sweat equity. Let's get this party started with Nicole.
Law Smith
3:44
A half Give. Give the plugs where people find you. Oh, we know. You know, you want an award for your podcast? The podcast already? many awards. You want a potty already? So
2
Speaker 2
3:59
what a potty. My kid takes it every night straight to bed upon. Yeah. Oh, we're still in potty training. Okay, plugs. Yes. Nick off comm that's where you can find everything. You can find my album tour poster, my podcast called the half cast, which apparently is one of potty. Oh, you didn't know. I didn't know. You know, because this whole COVID thing. Everything's going crazy. I wasn't able to attend the ceremony. And so I'm pretty sure Rogen just accepted on my behalf. I think he really you know, stood up there and said out of Texas
Law Smith
4:36
Yeah, yeah, let me sign out of Texas. Yeah. Eric, Nick, Nick.
4:41
Really forever I'm gonna accepted your award.
2
Speaker 2
4:44
Like Nick could make it he's very busy but I I was able to make time to go to Birmingham, Alabama to accept this.
3
Speaker 3
4:52
I apologize. We get I get some guests foisted that I'm not entirely familiar with
4:58
Sure. No, no, sorry. I
Law Smith
5:00
told you about Nick though. You know he may run those atmospheres. I know that. Last time I saw him he was opening for Larry, the cable guy out of, you know, out of the Tampa Bay area. So who knows who you're you're hobnobbing with these days.
2
Speaker 2
5:16
I know. Well, it's not Rogan. It's not Rogen. Apparently he moved to Austin and closed down the comedy club.
Law Smith
5:23
The one the one you all have LA.
5:25
The one in Austin. No.
Law Smith
5:28
No city closed. I heard but Rumor has it he's probably just gonna throw money at that.
2
Speaker 2
5:35
That's what I would do. If I were him. I'd be like, that's the one place within a stone's throw where I can get up every night. Yeah, I'm gonna go ahead and plunk down a couple bucks.
Law Smith
5:43
And I think he saves 13 million by going from California to Texas just by the tax break. He'll build his own club from that hundred million dollars of Spotify. So yeah, there's also rumor he'll build another club to
2
Speaker 2
5:57
why why did he move just before the Spotify check cleared?
Law Smith
6:03
It seemed that way. I love it. It seemed very calculated. And I listened to pretty much every episode The last couple of years. So it's one of those things where if you kind of listen with your ear to like, he's been kind of talking about this for a little bit.
6:19
Oh, you're still at all along?
Law Smith
6:21
No, but I mean, like hold? No, no, I'm no soothsayer, but I'm saying like it's one of those things where you look back and you're like, Yeah, he's kind of been talking shit about California for a while and then that deal happened and someone reported that it was like 13 million to say just just straight up from the tax part to pack
6:40
your shit up faster.
2
Speaker 2
6:41
Yeah, yeah, right especially now that they California is talking about I know how interesting this is but the law about taxing people so that you know even if they move they still get it.
Law Smith
6:54
Yeah, good fucking luck on that.
2
Speaker 2
6:56
Yeah, exactly. Exactly. The guys that are making the laws are the dudes that are making that money so
Law Smith
7:02
yeah, they move in? Or it's not their money. It's just like let's not let's not lower the biz the corporate tax rate to get you know, maybe manufacturers of cars back you know, they're all in the south now. They used to be all in California. And now they're every state's got like Mercedes, like, all these states that you're like, wait, South Carolina has Audi and shit like that. And you're like, they're all being manufactured over there. Because they moved over from the west coast and they're just like, fuck it. And that that what is it they call it? It's like a luxury. Luxury taxes. Baseball. It's a might be luxury.
7:37
selection. Taxes monopolize?
Law Smith
7:39
Yeah, that has been awfully
7:41
$75. Yeah.
Law Smith
7:42
Yeah, that's a Whammy spot. At any rate, like the way they tried to do it, it's like almost unprecedented. Like, you'll, you'll what you'll what will happen is it'll have such a negative effect if people just move in there to begin with. You know, it's like such a shall prevent
8:01
people from coming.
Law Smith
8:02
Yeah, it's a short term money thing, right? Because if you're making money doing your own thing, and another state and you're like, Washington to Silicon Valley, you're like, fuck that noise. Like, is it 10 years? it'll, it'll, you'd see that decreasing.
8:17
Everything's going digital. Anyways,
Law Smith
8:18
look, when I moved out of California, orders don't matter. I moved out of California, they had a law that you have to and I did it too. I you have to submit five days after you technically leave the state. This is 10 years ago. And if you don't, the DMV sends you all the like, the registration shit that you owe, and then penalties on top of that. And I was like, I fucking this that's the worst is I was like, a noun Florida and I fucking did this. I actually did the stupid thing that I heard about. And I shouldn't have a fine. You guys should owe me money in my time spent right? You know, I just had to deal with it a fucking again, because they didn't update the computers.
2
Speaker 2
8:55
California screwed me when I first moved out here. My dad was like, well, you should register your car in Nebraska way cheaper. And so I kept doing that I kept re registering in Nebraska. And then finally, when the guy was like, Hey, you got to be you've been here for too long. You got to get California plates or whatever. I was like, Alright, he goes How long's carbon here? And the dude was cool with me like a young dude sitting there at the DMV. He was like, oh, here this for me, Nate. Yeah, it's really easy. Just do this. How long's carbon hairs doesn't really matter. And I was like, Oh, we I've been here since 2005. And then he gave me the bill. Any back charged me for three years. Guys like $900 I was like, $900. Yeah,
9:33
yeah, yeah. Take it up with Nebraska buddy.
9:36
Right. I paid
Law Smith
9:38
for those years. Oh, and you have nothing that you can't do anything. You can't. It's not like you can go like fight it. They'll just be like, yeah, good luck with that. Yeah.
9:47
You say Can I have that form back? I think I made a mistake. What?
Law Smith
9:53
What's it called? So when you're not on the I talked to you on the phone yesterday? I was I we've been mean to have you on. I keep forgetting to Reach out. So your your you haven't been up on stage since March. Are you gonna go nuts?
2
Speaker 2
10:08
Yes, yes. And luckily I told myself when when everything was canceled, right when March Madness was canceled. And I said to myself, I go, okay. And then my gig on the 13th of March was cancelled, saying we
Law Smith
10:22
are doing dates like an alcoholic.
10:25
Like, yes.
10:27
I get a coin, like I haven't been on stage in a year.
2
Speaker 2
10:33
I said to myself then, and everybody was like, Oh, yeah, it'll be a month or two. And I said, then I said, I'm not getting back on stage this year. It's not gonna happen. And I think had I not made that agreement with myself in my head. I be going super crazy right now, because I am going crazy. Like I'm getting really itchy and feel like I'm just stagnant and going nowhere. But But I had come to terms of that back in March, but had I not had I thought, okay, six weeks, we'll be back. Okay, eight weeks, we'll be back. Okay, how about 12 weeks will be had I done that game, then I would be just full blown. Just off the walls here.
3
Speaker 3
11:09
So once you made that agreement, did you have any plan in place to take up your time? Did you say I'm gonna learn how to do this or anything? Or
Law Smith
11:15
how to pivot? I'm kind of curious on how everybody's kind of pivoting to figure out what to do in the meantime.
2
Speaker 2
11:23
Yeah, some guys some guys right away said okay, now I'm going all zoom. I have a couple buddies that do like three or four corporate Xoom shows a week. And they're like, I'm not really seeing a drop off in my in my income, as well as cool way to do it. But that's pretty
Law Smith
11:40
awesome. Was it Patrick Keane? He was calling Moulton. Do you
11:43
know Colin?
Law Smith
11:45
I think through you, actually. But he's, I mean, Patrick was on the show motivated two months ago, I didn't know he did all this corporate stuff. So
2
Speaker 2
11:53
Well, I mean, he's fairly clean. And I love Patrick. He's really funny. Um, but yeah, Colin, like, built his little studio in his garage. And he just does them all out of his house. He's like, now I have almost no overhead. I don't travel, I just make calls every day. I've you know, set up the system to get these shows. I didn't do that. I didn't like the idea of zoom shows. I I always considered myself more of a performer than just a stand there. Joke writer. I'm not like a one liner guy or anything.
Law Smith
12:21
Yeah, your material things but you sell
12:24
materials garbage. But I can I can act it out like crazy.
2
Speaker 2
12:30
And so I right away signed up for a writing class. I was like, Okay, let me get, like, get some scripts pounded out, like work on the shows that I've been meaning to develop for the last couple years. So I kind of went that way, I kind of turned and said, Okay, I you know, two thirds of my incomes cut off, I still have a third, then we'll float us and that'll be fine. And now I can like kind of, because always look at always looked at show business and probably all businesses this way. But I always look to show business, kind of like a checkerboard. And they're all these pieces, you got to move your acting piece forward, you got to move your writing piece forward, you got to move your standup piece forward. And you never know which one's going to hit your podcast piece forward, until eventually one of them gets kinked. And then you're like, boom, boom, boom, and it helps all the other pieces. So I've always, you know, and I, the last few years, I've just been focused on stand up. As I go, it's time to move some of you get that left corner piece out of there. That's just doing nothing moving
Law Smith
13:23
back room. I'm so glad that he's checkers, not chess as the analogy. I'm
13:27
not smart enough to use the chess reference.
Law Smith
13:30
That's Yeah, it's diversifying, attaching a bit. It's like, well, it's kind of what you have to do when you're in your position as like, your professional entertainer, you know, as Yes, as you know, it's that thing of like, and that's why i think i think it's interesting to have comics on because they're all entrepreneurial, whether they want to use that word or not like because none of them think of them selves as businessmen or women. But you really have to make your own shit happen. Yeah, and that's really what doing your own business is anyway,
3
Speaker 3
14:01
and those writing classes that's reinvesting in yourself. It's continuing education. It's like, that's not just like, Oh, I learned how to you know, whatever. widdle wood. Stupid that's like, once it's done, it's like, well, I'll never do that. Again. You're using that going forward. And that's gonna help you everywhere to the writing class. Right,
2
Speaker 2
14:19
right. That is on the resume now. Yeah, that's it. Nothing else. Oh, good. Time I submit for something it's, it's right there with that PDF
14:27
certified certificate thing. Put that on there, attach it and email.
Law Smith
14:32
Were you able to do any acting gigs before the pandemic kind of started because you were doing at one point you were in like three national commercials playing one year, like, all football season, I'm like, I know that dude. I know.
14:45
There is that face. Again.
Law Smith
14:47
It's Miller Lite commercial who gives a shit. But that's usually that's cool.
2
Speaker 2
14:53
Now I wasn't able to do any like in January, February before everything hit and then everything closed down is starting to reopened a little bit. I've had a few auditions that are just me and my house recording myself. That's how they people now
Law Smith
15:08
that's more brutal than listen to your own stand up. I think
2
Speaker 2
15:11
it's so horrible to sit there because not only like you go into an audition room, and there's a guy with a camera and he tells you Okay, here's what you do. You go in there you do it, you walk out you go, Well, I'm stupid. You leave, like repeating the lies to yourself, but then maybe you get it later. It's over.
Law Smith
15:26
Maybe you get a laugh out of that guy who's dead on the inside, because he's seen every fucking neurotic anxious person in LA come. Yes. Yeah, yeah, but yeah,
3
Speaker 3
15:34
and you also have to leave to they got other people in your house. Did I nail it? I'm just gonna do one more. I'll do this. Do 11 more. Okay,
2
Speaker 2
15:43
only do you have to do that. But then you have to put it into your computer from your camera. Then you got to put it into the right format to upload it. You're looking at your something like this. Yeah, I hate like, why did I move my arm that way? Like you have no control over any of that. Go into a room.
3
Speaker 3
15:58
Which one? Do I look the best? Which one? Okay, that one a little bit funnier. Really? Are you telling yourself that? What a dork like it's just over. It's Oh, oh my god. It's the worst. Oh, I had
Law Smith
16:09
Harrigan I did an audition in the room with each other in the room. Yeah, that was the fucking worst because I can't read. I can't read. I can't read. I did auditions in LA. I had friends that would get me in them. And I'm like, they'd put it on. Like, you know Pictionary, like big? The write out? Whatever. Yeah. And I'd be like, Fuck, cuz I can't I can't read out loud very well at all. I think this part of the reason I got into kind of doing stand up is just like, I'll make up with it for talking a lot. And nobody knows what the real words are. Yeah, I don't know how to I don't need to spell this shit in the future. And so, uh, what's it called? Like? I was like, Can Eric kind of leave the room is like, no.
3
Speaker 3
16:51
Watch. Oh, yeah. like to watch because you watch mine for I went for?
Law Smith
16:55
I know. It's trying to I'm just trying to pick off anything I could rip off.
2
Speaker 2
16:58
Yeah. It's always worse with people, you know? Because you know, they're the ones that judge you and know you so that they just like, look at this idiot. Yeah,
17:06
you got to see him again.
Law Smith
17:08
Yeah, and his was good. And his was good. And mine was like,
17:11
his audition was good.
Law Smith
17:12
It was good. I've seen auditions and ship before you know how it goes, like
17:17
commercials read and his last name. Right? Wow, you didn't
Law Smith
17:22
get those cue cards. But it's definitely like, what's it called? It's definitely that thing I you forget. You have to like, over act and commercials and stuff. You have to over emote and all that. And I kind of was like, Oh yeah, I'm glad he went first. Because he's gonna do it that way. But like you're trying to you're trying to improvise while reading. I was like, my brain just is like, yeah. wasn't fun. Yeah. Yeah. So none of that. So podcasts and stuff. Like, what? The writing class is interesting that you filled your time correctly. Because, man that can go the other way very easily. It can go like, well, now I just sleep a lot more or like and invest in some weed. Yeah. Or next a goody. Goody. Good. He doesn't do he doesn't do anything. I'm
18:11
saying he could have Yeah,
2
Speaker 2
18:13
maybe not. I could have gone. Well, that's the reason I've never smoked weed is because I have an addictive personality. I know if I opened up the floodgates. That's all I do. All day. Wow.
Law Smith
18:22
That's how I feel about hookers. I think once you pop that Pringles Can you can't stop.
18:27
You're probably
18:28
a limiting factor there, buddy.
Law Smith
18:30
No. No, I know. A lot of friends that. Not a lot of buddies that,
18:40
you know, get some kind of subscription monthly deal.
Law Smith
18:43
Yeah, yeah, that's a good one.
18:45
They write that down.
Law Smith
18:47
That's your material man. Eric starting to get into stand up. What advice do you have for
2
Speaker 2
18:53
starting to get into it? Right when everything shuts down? Yep. Perfect.
18:58
Perfect time.
Law Smith
18:59
Everybody's that everybody goes back to zero. It's like Fight Club. So it
2
Speaker 2
19:03
is a little bit like that. You see, you know, there's gonna be opportunities that come out of this that you know, people are gonna, yeah, I thought about that. Because every time I'd go out to the IRS, I can link this into advice to you, I would just be there all the time. That's what you really want to do. If you want to do stand up, just be at a comedy club all the time. Let us see you. That's you know, a when I was starting out I go to the Comedy Store but I only go like every other week and that really wasn't enough like I'd be doing other shows other places. But as far as the Comedy Store concerned, I was just this twice a month guy and and I wish I had put more time into it. Just being there, you know, soaking in and making the kind of connections the friends that also keep you accountable. Like Where have you been? Why haven't because it's easy to quit stand. Yeah.
Law Smith
19:51
Yeah. No one's no one's telling you to stay in,
2
Speaker 2
19:54
right? Oh, no. I mean, the biggest name Seinfeld tomorrow could be like I'm thinking of course. And then people like oh,
20:01
yeah, interesting.
Law Smith
20:04
You gave it all. You know,
2
Speaker 2
20:06
you'd be called Gotham The next night like hey, Seinfeld's done.
Law Smith
20:11
But yeah, I felt spot I remember us going to we would go do a shitty open mic and then just go hang out in the back of a room have a good show? A lot. Yeah. Because it was like, in the, you know, if you're trying to do your own, like hustle in a business way, it's, it's Top of Mind marketing. It's reminding people you're around, I got a lot of shows just by showing up in the beginning, like when I was like 2122 showing up at open mics consistently. And then they'd see you do one good set, and then you just keep showing up. And then you have later on, they'll be like, I have this other show. You know, that is actually a show not an open mind. You should do. I'll put you on that one. You're like, okay, you know, you just start doing that. Yeah. And I mean, networking in a business sense. It's the same way. A lot of it's just being around and showing up and people know that you're there. in a lot of respects.
2
Speaker 2
21:02
Yeah. Well, you and I both know, people that that's what they base their careers around just being good at the business side of it. The networking side. Yeah. They're not necessarily funny. Comedians, they're just there.
Law Smith
21:13
They're salespeople. Yeah,
2
Speaker 2
21:15
they're salespeople. And they're really good at that. And they've built careers out of this.
Law Smith
21:19
Yeah, they're, they're hunters, they're better on the production side, they're better at the networking side. You know, they're better at sending the random texts or phone calls to a lot of people that met their their salesmen, hunters, not farmers, but there's a balance it, they'll, they'll get to a spot really fucking good on stage. At some point, a lot of them that are like that, right?
2
Speaker 2
21:42
They'll find that other checker piece, like I put the example I can think of, and I don't even think you'd be offended to hearing that, like Judd Apatow, like, from all accounts. So he was just a middling or just jet. Don't worry, I'm still casting record myself. I'll do it. 27 times. made the list, buddy. No, like, I wasn't around to see him do stand up in the 80s and 90s. But from all accounts as he was like, good, yeah, that's great. Good, but he found like his lane to excel in. And he was able to do it that side. Like he was very good at that side of it. And now it's helped him he's done tonight show sad. He's had specials now, you know, on stand up.
Law Smith
22:26
Yeah, yeah. Yeah. And he found like, Okay, well, this kind of gave him the checker piece to get to the other thing, too. You can leverage what you've learned. I mean, his story, he used to go in comedy clubs at like, 11 an interview. Right? Right. Because his mom is old. Yeah, cuz. Oh, yeah. Right. Yeah, he's always hanging out there. So like, he had that passion in that world from the get go. But it's, I always find it interesting to know when he had to like cut bait go, I'm probably better behind the scenes with Yeah, and they're, you know, in front of it as well. It's interesting.
3
Speaker 3
22:57
People be like, Oh, we only got that latest Netflix special because he directed all those movies. And it's funny.
Law Smith
23:03
That helps.
3
Speaker 3
23:04
No, I know. But I'm saying like, there's also Netflix comedians on there that are not as funny as that appetizer. I got it for whatever other reason, where it's like, oh, well, they they really hit this demo.
Law Smith
23:15
I can tell you they're white male. Right. Yeah. But the irony of stand up is like, the white male is like, easy, you
3
Speaker 3
23:27
know, I know you don't want this haircut. You know, people attach me to shit.
Law Smith
23:32
Oh, yeah, you look like Edward Norton will go rule so you can fucking rope backwards dunk.
23:42
Say you're racist. Whatever you're about to say.
Law Smith
23:43
That's the worst part of that movie is the backwards dunk on the tennis courts. in American history, actually remember that?
2
Speaker 2
23:50
I only saw that movie one time. I actually own that movie, but I've only watched it one time just because it's so disturbing. I can't take the curb moments. I just I don't.
Law Smith
24:00
I never I disagreed. I think the dunks the most disturbing.
24:06
But what did he do? He does Ed Norton dunk. He does like he does.
24:10
That's enough. Yeah. At Norton dunked that's insanity.
Law Smith
24:15
I want to say it's a reverse dog. Like NBA Jam. Running guy. I don't remember.
24:19
I wonder how high the hoop actually was for that.
Law Smith
24:23
He's like, Alright, I got this. I think he's wearing jeans too. I was
24:27
of course wearing jeans.
24:30
Backwards dunk.
Law Smith
24:32
This means that well, the guy that se is Yeah, in the tennis courts nonetheless to dude like, the worst shittiest like we we used to go play out there. It's like, there's sand on the fucking door. And there's crazy people walking through all the games. Oh, yeah,
2
Speaker 2
24:48
there is a guy out there with a broomstick to lower it down to the same level that they had to for Woody Harrelson and white men.
Law Smith
24:54
Gary goes actually I heard woody Cannonball but I don't know if he can dunk. He
24:58
could tell he could play Little bit but Duncan Yeah, I don't know.
Law Smith
25:01
I want to say yeah, that's legit. But I don't remember. Billy just dukey Brothers, but the What's it called? Wow, fucking I lost my train of thought.
25:15
I don't remember either. You don't
1
Speaker 1
25:18
thought you were giving advice as an old Sage seasoned veteran doing a reverse dunk to Eric something
25:23
about that.
Law Smith
25:25
Yeah, a lot of it's that a lot of it showing up a lot of its being in the back of the room. Being around it helps to
2
Speaker 2
25:32
I yeah, who was it? Was it Woody Allen that said like 90% of success is just showing up. I mean, that's how he got his wife. Right. She was just at his house.
25:42
Wow, she took that
25:48
job and Woody right up against a
Law Smith
25:50
wall that Woody. You do improv that you've never said that before? That's pretty good. I've never said that before.
25:55
That work. Pretty good.
Law Smith
25:57
Especially in our podcasts. That was like right over the boat. He was
3
Speaker 3
26:01
handing out fatherly advice. And she listened and she took in and now she's,
Law Smith
26:05
you know, I mean? Sure. But what I have often I have a similarity where I think anxiety drives you in a way have you haven't been able to kind of deal with being anxious about not getting up and all that stuff? Have you found any kind of different? Like I've been trying to fill the time wisely in a similar way but because it's really easy to fucking just be like, ooh, fucking sucks. Fuck a pandemic. Oh shit, but I know, I know when we were on the road and stuff doing the tours and whatnot that we did. It was like our anxiety manifests in a different way but I think it gives you that pressure to like alright, I gotta fucking focus on this set even though it's last set we're both last second people That's right. Yes. Yes that because that you did your taxes code times. Like the 14th of April and your wife was in the car I think both times were the vast
27:05
when I did the taxes this time. July 15.
Law Smith
27:07
Yes, I used all the time you know you can get an extension every year to like October if you do
2
Speaker 2
27:12
I did one time and then they like they charge you a fee. They're like the juice was running that whole time. I don't know if you know that this
Law Smith
27:20
business actually got to October. What?
27:23
Yeah, don't
27:24
tell me this. I don't use till October. I'll give
Law Smith
27:27
you my ruined relax. I'll give you my CPA Michael Messina. CPA the stars. Yeah. Oh,
2
Speaker 2
27:33
my goodness. I'll be in prison next time you guys interview. Like what happened? I don't know.
Law Smith
27:39
What To be fair, I say his biggest thing is he's not Jewish. So I got an Italian dude, my fucking taxes.
2
Speaker 2
27:45
Whoa, I am a last minute guy. And the only reason that works is because that last minute finally comes. Yeah, and the problem with this pandemic is that last minute isn't here, right or no deadlines. There's nothing so I've been trying to develop like a system that works I haven't found it yet. So if you guys have it, I mean, this my latest system is a little list book where I try and highlight the things that Okay, I'm going to do these things today. But this is such a small notebook like this. Who Who knows where that goes at some point. Okay, and then it's just I go down a YouTube wormhole Sara was we watched the her wife's social dilemma. Have you seen that? No, for free to
28:29
know. My friend to be like,
28:31
oh, everything sucks. And we're the ones
Law Smith
28:34
Yeah, I've heard about it in the same I'm kind of avoiding it because I don't want to be like I'm a fucking sucker and I don't want to be like colleges playing against everything I suspected is true.
2
Speaker 2
28:43
It makes you feel like a dirtbag exists almost instantly and doesn't relent for 90 minutes and you're like they're right everything they're saying is right and this The phone is the cigarette of our generation and even though we know it's bad and it's doing all these things we're still just just smoking I'm I know it's got a hold of me like that's what's gonna happen especially if it's brain tumors years from now they're like Wait, why are you still using a phone grandpa I just need it nearly
3
Speaker 3
29:10
yeah like it yeah the neural we can put a neural link in and then it'll heal everything we won't get brain to Ilan musk
29:17
neuro like and he kind of he
29:20
and any sort of brain problem you're, you're fine
Law Smith
29:23
with that. So can I give a piece of advice, maybe get a legal pad let's start there, though, like bigger was
29:29
a bigger a bigger thing. something heavier to throw.
Law Smith
29:32
This is why we make the big bucks, you know, doing the show?
2
Speaker 2
29:35
Well, the latest thing that I wanted to try was to get some sort of like alarm that dings every 12 minutes or something like a snooze alarm. This is so bad dude, I started on
3
Speaker 3
29:45
I've done that where I will just set my alarm for 15 minutes at a time and on my watch and then it goes off and I'm like, Alright, am I doing something that I do something that 15 minutes or do I need to and it's like because we have nothing to do the time is kind Have it loses value. So if I know that 15 minutes has passed, I'm like, Okay, well, shit. I gotta reevaluate every 15 minutes. And it's me to do it as little as five minutes. Really? If you want to get on your ass.
Law Smith
30:10
Yeah, yeah, exactly. that's a that's a way I don't know, if you're not that way. I don't know, the way to do it.
30:18
You know, this is a recent problem for me,
Law Smith
30:20
are you I mean, the same. Getting up doing the routine, you got kids, you have three kids, I don't know how to do that. And they're all pretty young. And so you've got routines there, you just have to implement them. I think and I'm talking to you to tell myself as well it's one of those things where right right your stuff comes after theirs. But really you have to kind of get up before them get your shit done. Like get into
3
Speaker 3
30:46
your life when they wake up based around their framework right of what time they go to school or whatever it is that they have to do.
Law Smith
30:52
Yeah. You know get a little loving in with the wife before they wake up all those kind of things on your to do where they wake. Yeah,
30:59
right. Well, we can cross that off the list.
Law Smith
31:02
Shot. No need to go down that just a unit forever now.
2
Speaker 2
31:08
Yeah. Especially in the morning. There's just we've never been morning people hard to drink in the morning.
Law Smith
31:14
Yeah, sir thing. I mean, I just I hard. I did learn about Midwestern drinking from from going on tour and meeting. You know, a lot of a lot of family members around that you're friends with and whatnot. They're like, Oh, yeah, when it's in the winter, we just go in a basement and drink. Like all night. You're like what it's like, in Indiana got a better plan, buddy in Indiana. The sun goes down at 345. So guess what, you're gonna just be down there. I remember watching Bill Hicks at stairs. Your wife for those that don't know your wife's parents plays once you Bill Hicks in drinking like I handle of whiskey down there. And then you running barefoot on a treadmill? Because you couldn't run a mile barefoot in like 10 minutes or something
2
Speaker 2
32:04
that mile almost killed me. That mile almost was the enemy because I was trying to prove a point. But I think I was Yeah, I was pretty sauced and I was not in the best shape because we'd already been on tour for two months just eat and trash like subway was our healthy meal. Yeah, that was that was where like, Oh, just cold cut meats. That's our that's our top shelf right there. We zoom out. Are you in a wheelchair now?
32:29
That'd be great. If I just like I told you that my will kill me
Law Smith
32:33
that diabetes took the one leg. The other one is still good though. Yeah, the what's it called when we're on tour? That was grimy shit because we had no money. So it's just like, whatever. If anybody wants to buy us drinks after the show, we'll take those for sure.
3
Speaker 3
32:49
Take those calories. Yeah, fuel and interact with them. Yeah,
2
Speaker 2
32:53
that was the one that we did not in the tour bus. But in the four door sedan in Britain. I remember I got sick right after we were at your house. I was hanging out watching parents house. Yeah, at your parents house. I was sitting down there with your dad watching like a basketball game and he was smoking a cigar and it like started to make my nose run i think i think that's like what catapulted everything like I was not eating healthy. I was drinking like a fish every single night. And then finally I got this drainage down my throat and I got walking pneumonia that I had for two weeks where I'd be coughing so hard. Gonna be sick, but I'd be coughing so hard that I would barf. And I remember in Tallahassee I like Kevin, that one of the guys who were on tour with open the bathroom door I'm throwing up in the bathroom he's like hey Hoff they're about to announce you
Law Smith
33:38
know and you you went on a crush to Christian ponder in the crowd by the way the quarterback wow named Ross whoa let's say Sam ponder on ESPN her husband. Right The better way to do it. But yeah, you don't remember that day because you're sick you didn't hang out i don't
33:59
i don't
Law Smith
34:00
think i my buddy fe brought the crash and ponder the show Yeah, yeah. And I remember he threw up you got a is pretty pretty awesome to see like someone you're on tour with like puke and rally basically do 20 minutes do fucking by I'm going to sleep again. So yeah, I'm gonna go go to
2
Speaker 2
34:20
is Oh, no. That was brutal. Yeah, it was brutal. And yeah, then finally in like Charleston, South Carolina. I went to an urgent care and the guy goes you got walking pneumonia? Yeah. Oh, yeah. Okay, and he gave me a shot and like cleared me up and I was good to go after that.
Law Smith
34:37
I think that was the Z Pak. We were talking on the phone yesterday about that the Z Pak he took where he's like, Oh, this is like a magical elixir shot. I don't fucking antibiotics. AKA
2
Speaker 2
34:46
I want that. Okay, I really, I really felt like I was like in the movie Any Given Sunday and I was Lawrence Taylor was like, give me that cortisone because I was like, we have shows every night. I've got a show tonight and the doctor is like, so you got to get back out there. Right? Kenny just
35:02
asked, and I was like, all right, I made a lot of mistakes in my life.
Law Smith
35:06
Again, six inches in front of your face. Alright, we got to roll this out. Last thing we got to ask you is what advice would you give to your 13 year old self?
2
Speaker 2
35:18
The advice that I would give to my 13 year old self. Okay. So do you have to frame it in a way that a 13 year old would take it? Or?
Law Smith
35:27
Did I like the eight? I like a 16? I like making 13 good off.
3
Speaker 3
35:31
Not so new and whatever. Like, come on, I think it'd be a little older.
Law Smith
35:34
13 is specifically to make it weird, and set up any immature jokes.
35:41
I know. But okay, Rose, everybody.
Law Smith
35:43
But especially dudes. I know. I know. That's why it's great.
2
Speaker 2
35:47
Well, for me, 13 and 16 weren't that different? I hadn't hit puberty yet on either of them. I was probably five foot nothing. 97 pounds regardless. So at 13 The advice I'd give myself is one, don't jump from your deck to the tree. You're not gonna make it
36:10
to the wheelchair to
2
Speaker 2
36:14
come back for the football against the actress. Okay, I scored
Law Smith
36:18
down. Wow. And that pain, all right. I yes, every day, every day, dude every day,
2
Speaker 2
36:26
not every day. But every year for sure. I think about that drop more than the guy tipped it right. And I thought it was getting over as a stretch fingers I thought I had I was in the end zone. I thought it was making it over him at the last second he just tipped it over my head.
Law Smith
36:40
I'm sure you won't go on that pain on your kids playing football.
36:44
It's like four arm shift 5am tip drills
Law Smith
36:47
never do
2
Speaker 2
36:49
ever always come back for it yet. Um, and the most real advice which I would still give to myself is just do it now. You know it, whatever you have to do, do it. Now don't worry about things being perfect. Sometimes good is good enough. Like I constantly do that if I film a comedy short or something, or anything I'm doing I want it to be perfect before I like put it out there a joke. But nine times out of 10. If I just go on stage with a new idea, it has something to it. It may not be a polished thing, but it's got something that works. That makes me feel good. But when I hold on to something that's too precious, then I end up just like whittling it down to nothing. Or it never goes out I filmed something before the pandemic that just sits here on this stupid hard drive ever good. I haven't even edited because it's just yeah, I start and I'm like, I'm frustrated. Why did we shoot it that way? And then it's probably a good thing on there.
Law Smith
37:46
Yeah, edit it, dummy. Put it I just
3
Speaker 3
37:47
do it. Just do take and put it on your computer and just organize it. That's what I like. That's something I do where I'm just like, Alright, I don't need to edit it right now. Just organize it and just get it and maybe I'll come across a little something and then that gets a little bit of a little bit of a spark. You're like alright, I'll just mess with this for a second. And then next thing you know, you're editing for two hours.
2
Speaker 2
38:05
Yeah, small steps. Yeah, I often I often look at the entire to do list and I get frustrated. Right? Whereas if I just did I've tried to now set yourself up. You've got to trick yourself. Yeah, cuz this thing is screwing you.
Law Smith
38:20
Right? Right. Exactly.
38:22
My brain.
2
Speaker 2
38:24
My brain said there was a very specific point in my head where my brain resides he
Law Smith
38:29
can't see his other hand. It's at his dick but yeah. Yeah, pretty much. Well, thanks for coming on, dude. And yeah, let me know whenever podcast you need. You need a scab. Guest I'm ready.
38:43
Yeah. Thanks for having me on fellas.
38:46
So yeah, stay alive.
